from AskMyDaddy

Do supernetworkers contribute to bad networking?

You asked

As a subordinate currently, what is the most effective way to deal with a difficult boss who may not seem pleased most of the time, inspite of the good work one puts in, or atleast attempts to put in in the intial stages of a new job, and thereby learning the essential ropes for further growth?

MyLinkDaddy writes

First, get objective feedback from your boss, a colleague, or someone in the industry. Perhaps you are a bad fit for the position and don't have the right skill set. I've hired staff who were terrific but just didn't fit into the specific position, situation, organization, industry, etc.

If the situation is so bad and communication so constrained that you're reaching out like this, it means the manager is not doing his job and there is little hope. People rarely change. There may not be a solution, in which case your only resort is a new job or another manager or position with the company.

While it may seem like the end of the world, this is just one job in your career. You'll have a long career with good bosses and bad. Your objective with a good situation is indeed to thrive and grow. In a bad situation you have to moderate that and aim to keep this short-term - tolerate or even ignore the boss, find enjoyment where you can. Seek mentors in the company outside your boss or even in other companies for support. Do outside work that will help you grow. And of course move to a better company or position.

You can try HR. But that rarely works. In most cases, if you want to improve your relationship, that only can be done with your manager's help. If you haven't already done so, meet with him on a personal basis to solicit his feedback and advice. Even better get him away form the office where has a superior position and in an informal situation where he can open up.

If that is not viable or doesn't work, you must manage the manager, if you're up to it. Remember only YOU are in control of your career. People are not machines. We are social and emotional animals. We favor those who are like us. Try to understood how and why he acts, what interests and motivates him (logical, emotional, interpersonal, etc.) The idea is not just to "do your job", but to do it in a way that he "gets". Talk with your colleagues and other managers in the company to understand the pressures on him, how he works, and get the big picture.

You may not be alone. Talk with your colleagues. See if they have similar issues. If so, you have strength and some measure of anonymity in the group and more options to meet with HR, the boss's boss, or the boss directly.